I'm handsome....like a mango

I gotta tell you what I'm feelin' inside, I could lie to myself, but it's true
There's no denying when I look in your eyes, girl I'm out of my head over you

I see my future when I look in your eyes
It took your love to make my heart come alive

There's a lot I want to tell you, but I don't know where to start
And I don't know what I'd do if you walked away

It seems the more I get to know you, the more I need to make you see
You're everything I need, yeah

The King of Hearts, when she's layin' next to me
Shinin' like a jewel tonight, love is gonna rule tonight
Yeah I'm gonna be the only one, to be King of Hearts

Madness in Humanity

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. Ender , however, was trying to figure out a way to forestall vengence. To keep him from taking him in a pack tomorrow. I have to win this now, and for all time, or I'll fight it everyday and it will get worse and worse. Ender knew the unspoken rules of manly warfare, even though he was only six. it was forebidden to strike the opponent who lay helpless on the ground; only an animal would do that.

Life, Wraped Up

We try to come as close as we can to what we
can’t and not get caught, but, instead, let’s turn
and run towards the light!

We’re dancing on the fence.
We’re losing innocence,
but we can’t expect to live like this forever.
We weren’t made to live like this, no never!

This is something that has been on my mind alot lately...just the fact of everyone going off to college and moving on to new and more exciting things but now they are coming home to tell all about it. Its just the fact that you always thought you knew them and who they were but now we're finding out who they really are, what they really believe. At the same time its nice to know that only a few of us really are true to our word, true to ourselves and it makes us even more sure of who we are and what we want to be. Its just interesting because with friends I meet that were already like that I just accepted it as them but when I have friends who are just turning into that I know its not really who they should be and it kills me to know. Double standard I guess but its real. Yet at the same time you wonder what they think of you now, how you've changed and what you have turned into. If its someone who you said you never thought you'd be or if its someone who just blends into the mist.

On another note, I'm starting to come back to my old self on trusting God. The last few days I've just layed myself down and said ok god, I trust you with this stuff and I know in the end it will turn out to something amazing and thats what I want. It really is worth the waiting, so dont wuss out halfway through because its starting to get hard. Just know that if it really truly is what you think it is then it cant go wrong.

Christmas is here...i think it might accualy be my first white Christmas ever..which is cool but at the same time kinda weird and I'm starting to hate the snow cuz there are days where I cant do anything or go anywhere besides work. I can drive in it just fine and its not hard or anything but its the parentals that disagree. I guess they just dont understand that with this type of weather im not going to mess around cuz I love my car too much to try to go 45 down murry while its 6 inches deep of snow. And it scares the crap outa me to do that cuz any minute I could hit ice or loss control. But my car handles great in it and I'm having fun. Yet at the same time I cant wait for it all to be gone and have alot of things just back to normal..including work. I feel like I work my butt off and then i get a check thats less than $300 which isnt something I wanna see. I'm used to $400 and than another $200 but i barley made $400 between the two. I cant live off of $400 every two weeks..I need $600 lol. Ive been getting used to the comfort of having some extra cash to throw around but I've been making do with what Ive been getting cuz I have to, so I know once it goes back to what it should be I'll be saving tons for some things I really want like my car. So much to do with the car, fix some body issues, fix some things with the steering, get new rims, get a new paint job, finish my audio system which I am sooo pumped to do cuz its already bumping pretty nicely but with 2 12" subs at 1200 watts, WOW thats going to sound amazing. ALSO I have this trust fund thing that I should be getting sooner or later which will be a good amount that I'm going to put in another account and just have it build but I'm going to use some of that for a lil surprise. So after Christmas if I get the money ask tell me to show you my surprise and I will, its going to be awesome I cant wait.

Whatever helps you sleep at nite

tell whatever yourself what you need to in order to sleep at nite, but its what keeps you up at nite that you got to explain to yourself. but remember its only yourself that you have to explain urself to, no matter what others tell you as long as YOU know the truth and can sleep with it. Dont be afraid to admit that you have a heart full of black, because even if you dont feel the black that is in you, you do feel something sometime. Dont spend you life as an explaination but an exclaimation. Let people know who you were, good or bad, and they will remember you, not for where your heart was, but what it was that you did with it. Dont be afraid to conquer mountains that others would never even dream of climbing. The past is the past and all you can do is smile, say it was worth it and move forward with those experiences. Embrass life and dont be afraid to live it to the fullest that you can. BUT dont get too caught up living it to forget who it is that is living it.

Just tell me theres no chance, so i dont have to worry about accualy having to make a choice or thinking about the whole situation. Just tell me that I have something that I cant throw away, something that accualy means alot to me. Just tell me anything that I dont want to hear so that I dont have to question myself

Hide Your Heart

Johnny saw her riding on a street car named Desire, his fate was sealed
She could see him coming like a hundred other guys, it was no big deal
Rosa had a lover on the shady side of town, Tito, he was king of the streets She was his possession like a jewel on his crown, Johnny better run, better run

Better hide your heart, better hold on tight
Say your prayers, 'cause there's trouble tonight
When pride and love battle with desire
Better hide your heart, 'cause you're playing with fire

The ride was over but the story doesn't end, he took her heart
She looked him in the eye and said they couldn't meet again
You could see the trouble start
The word went out that Rosa's messin' with someone, it was on the street
Tito looked for Johnny with a vengeance and a gun
Johnny better run, better run

Johnny's holdin' Rosa on a rooftop in the night, as time stood still
They couldn't hear him coming 'til he had them both in sight
You could feel a chill
A shot ran out like thunder and the blood was on her hands, with nothing won
When someone lies dying, lovers finally understand

When pride and love battle with desire
Better hide your heart, 'cause you're playing with fire